We are told time and time again that prevention is better than cure. To do this, we must first recognise the signs of a problem.
Here in the UK, the stiff upper lip still presides, especially regarding subjects such as health and wellbeing. We cannot learn the signs of mental health issues if we cannot talk about them.
Thankfully, the tide is changing, making it more acceptable to discuss concerns and feelings. However, too many of us are steeped in the old traditions of keeping it to ourselves. Silence is killing people.
It has taken me a long time to learn what the early warning signs of a depressive episode are for me. As with all issues, the way they manifest differs from person to person.However, recognising them has been vital in me being able to deal with the episodes and the reason for them before they cause too much damage.
Therapy was the route for me. This included professional therapy (CBT and talking), self-help books, online courses, and peer-to-peer support. Not all of these helped (and in a couple of cases, they did some harm), but I started to see patterns in what was happening each time. I began to recognise behaviours in myself that prevented me from acknowledging and dealing with these signs.
I realised just how deep-rooted my sense of shame and worthlessness was. I also realised that I was existing, not living. My need for external validation enhanced my feelings of shame and kept me quiet. I no longer need anyone’s approval regarding how I live my life.There were many other realisations during my long and painful journey.
Each realisation provided clarity on the starting point for each bout of depression. These realisations also enabled me to see myself and my experiences objectively. From this, I built a mental checklist of things to be aware of, such as more than a few days with poor/lack of sleep, obsessive and intrusive thoughts, and lack of motivation and confidence.
Something else that I was also able to build to help me see the early warning signs was a genuine support network in the shape of friends and a couple of loved ones. These people are not afraid to speak out and tell me if they think I’m starting down the slippery slope. I’m fortunate to have them and their support. My support network also encourages and bolters me while I work my way back up.
My checklist is not foolproof. Some of my psychological hard wiring still exists and can override my warning system. However, this is for increasingly shorter spells. I can no longer deny the needs of my body and mind for long. It has been a long road that has been worth the time.
I may never be free of depression and other related issues, and I’ve come to terms with that. However, what I can do is have as much control as I can over how much of a role it plays in my life.
Written By Lorna Smart
Blogger @Poemstellium
Instagram @lornasmartwordcrafter
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